As a relationship coach, online dating comes up constantly! I often get asked, “What’s the best dating site for a serious relationship?” (So much so that I’ve written a whole blog on this topic here!) If you’re frustrated with dating, it’s more about how you approach online dating rather than the app itself.
“I’m SO sick of the apps, endlessly swiping only to get ghosted or have awful dates over and over again!” Sound familiar?
It’s possible to have fun online dating and avoid getting frustrated. Learning how to make online dating fun is about your attitude and outlook surrounding your dating life.
Frustrated with Dating? Follow These Tips!
Online dating can be challenging—there’s no doubt about that! But there are ways to make it more enjoyable as you embark on your quest for love. Once you’ve narrowed down your pick for the best dating site for a serious relationship, get ready to open yourself up to all of the possibilities it may bring.
Dating should be fun and enjoyable. When it starts to feel like a chore, use these tips to get back on track!
You’ve probably heard about the people who swipe right aimlessly on every profile without even looking at them or reading the dating app questions. They claim it helps them get more matches. That might be true, since saying yes to everyone rather than picking and choosing will match you with more people. But that’s when it gets overwhelming and frustrating—sorting through all of those matches. Keep it simple by only having a handful of conversations going at a time. This way, you can focus on a few people and get to know them on a deeper level before you set a date or get back to swiping.
If someone you’ve matched with on a dating app gives you an uneasy feeling, listen to it! Following your instincts with online dating will help you avoid situations that leave you confused and frustrated. If you’ve been chatting with someone and something seems off, pay attention to those instincts. Often, we overlook potential red flags in hopes they aren’t true, which is a one-way ticket to disappointment! Ignoring dealbreakers and red flags leads to more failed dates and more dating burnout. You’ll just keep meeting the same types of toxic people. End that pattern by trusting your gut!
If dating feels like a job, you’re doing it wrong! Going out for drinks and dinner is fine and definitely can be fun, but try to mix things up to keep dating interesting. Go out for a fun activity with your date, like playing mini-golf, going bowling, trying your art skills out at a painting class, or channeling your inner kid at an arcade. This takes the pressure off from sitting across from each other and feeling like you’re in an interview. When you’re doing something fun together, you’re seeing a side of them you wouldn’t see just from a conversation, and you’ll enjoy yourself in the process.
This is a great time to be a tourist in your own city! Is there a restaurant you’ve really been wanting to try? Or what about a nearby botanical garden that you’ve been wanting to visit? Create a list of places in your area, including restaurants, activities, and locations for your future dates. This way, even if the date doesn’t end up being a long-term match, you at least got to check something off your list of places to see.
Creating an authentic dating profile is essential in the online dating experience. When answering dating app questions, be clear about what you’re looking for. Some dating apps have a specific category where you can list exactly what you want, whether it be a relationship, something casual, or if you’re not sure yet. If that’s not built into the app, you can always add it to your bio or in one of the prompts. You can say something like “looking for something real” or “a genuine connection,” or you can be more direct and say you want to find a long-term relationship. When chatting with potential matches and meeting them in person, be up front with them about what you’re looking for. Do you both want a family or marriage? If these things are important to you, don’t hesitate to discuss them when the timing feels right.
“Another date that didn’t lead to a second date—so exhausting! When will I find my forever person already?” STOP. Don’t manifest these negative feelings in your dating life. Again, this is all part of the dating process. You aren’t going to find your perfect person after only one date from a dating app (maybe some people have, but they’re the exception, not the norm!) The more dates you go on, the better you’ll get at being a good date for the next person. With each new potential date you meet, you develop more conversation skills and you practice getting to know someone new. This is how you learn exactly what you want in a relationship and what you don’t want. It allows you to better understand your needs and fail forward after each date or relationship.
Let’s Make Dating Fun Again
Are you tired of feeling frustrated with dating over and over?
For advice on everything from how to spot green flags in dating, what your love language is, and finding the best dating site for a serious relationship, the Heart Appeal community has you covered! Our relationship coach online dating experts are dedicated to helping you find the love you deserve.
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Hi, I’m Raghed!
Founder and lead relationship coach at HeartAppeal.
Our blog will be your new favorite place to go for advice, laughs, and comfort through all the stages of dating. We stay up-to-date on all the latest dating trends, so you don’t have to. Have a topic you’d like us to cover or a story you’d like to share with our community? Send me an email; we’d love to include it!